This is my learned response to the Supreme Court's ruling today:
Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious-looking bear. The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started putting them on. The second lawyer looked at him and said, "You're crazy! You'll never be able to outrun that bear!" "I don't have to," the first lawyer replied. "I only have to outrun you."
One day there was a rabbit and a snake who were both growing old and could not remember what animal they were. "OK I'll describe you and then see if you can guess what you are." said the snake. "That's a good idea." said the rabbit. "You are white, fluffy, and you have big ears and feet." said the snake. "Oh good, I'm a rabbit! So the rabbit says, "You are long, slim, and have a forked tongue." "Oh NO, I'm a lawyer!
A photographer was hired to take pictures at a lawyers' convention. When he lined up his subjects, he got them to look their best by shouting, "OK, everyone say, 'Fees!"
A lawyer, an engineer and a mathematician were called in for a test. The engineer went in first and was asked, ''What is 2+2?'' The engineer thought awhile and finally answered, ''4.'' Then the mathematician was called in and was asked the same question. With little thought he replied, ''4.0.'' Then the lawyer was called in, and was asked the same question. The lawyer answered even quicker than the mathematician, ''What do you want it to be?'' from cleanjoke.com
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